At that age

It's official. I've reached the age where everyone is always asking you when you're going to have a baby. It's funny, though, because I never got the "when are you getting married" question. It's just gone straight to "When are you going to have a baby?"

One of my cousins says I need to have a little boy. I say she should have a boy.

And another cousins asks whether or not my mom wants grandchildren. I say my brother will give her grandchildren.

Everyone knows at 14, I knew I wanted to be a mom someday. In my early 20's I said that if I didn't have a baby or wasn't in a serious committed relationship heading towards having a baby by the time I was 30, I would have one on my own. I never once thought I wouldn't have a baby by then.

My life has been up and down and at no time has it ever been the right time. Maybe there's never a right time to have a baby. Maybe you just have to make it work.

Right now, I'm okay not being a mom. I'm trying to be the cool aunt to my nieces. The great thing about having nieces? I can give them back. At the end of the day, when my patience is wearing thin, I can go home and relax, maybe with a drink, maybe with some cake, but definitely alone.

Years ago, I noticed that with each year that went by, not only did I get older, I became more selfish. I like doing what I want, when I want. With kids, you no longer have that luxury. You're responsible for another human being, another life. Someone else is counting on you to come through for them. And that way my life has been the last two years, is no way to raise a baby.

So to answer your question, no, I am not having a baby. Not any time soon. Nor in the foreseeable future.

I am perfectly happy being the "cool" aunt.

(At least I like to think I'm the "cool" aunt.)